fire! fire! Run and help me

There's been a breakdown in my internet:

We are currently investigating a national issue with platforms. All blueyonder customers will currently be experiencing problems accessing their email, webmail, the selfcare tools on the blueyonder website and their personal web page.

This issue is being investigated as a matter of the highest priority and we hope to resolve shortly.

then they added:

This issue may also affect broadband users trying to access web pages.

it does.

According to the ISP's website there's been an explosion in a junction room that has cut the cables that supply us. Oh, and by 'us' I mean the UK cable broadband. Only two million connections! Have fun folks.